There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
No subtext here. People are naked.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
When are your genitals available?
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize