And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
Randomize
