he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
You dont lie about slip and slides
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize
