Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
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