This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Randomize
