Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Randomize
