I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
