Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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