Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
I was not drunk enough for that final.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
