if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
