Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
I enjoy the company of your penis
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
So here I am, sexting at work.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
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