WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Randomize
