Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize
