That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
