is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
Randomize