yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
