umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
My dad is sitting where you rode me
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
