im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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