I just made out with a guy for $7.
Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
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