i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
it was like his penis was on wheels.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Randomize
