yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize