: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
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