erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
