I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
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