woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
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