i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
So squirting runs in the family.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
i now understand why vodka
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
