it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
Randomize
