I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Randomize
