I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
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