rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
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