Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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