I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
Randomize