reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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