my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
no, he came in my armpit
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
You have to summon your inner elephant
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
Randomize