Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
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