so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
