And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
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