I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Randomize