i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Randomize
