My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Let's get the cat blown out
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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