you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
somebody snuck up and got me drunk
What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
