I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
Slut skills are useful in every country.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Randomize
