so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Randomize
