Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
She made me pour olive oil on her.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
Randomize
