I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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