i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
