Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
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