If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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