Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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