I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Randomize
