she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
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