She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
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